further

i got locked outta my apt for like, 45 min.

too cold for that shit.

From Tif
10.28.09

finding things

I unarchived all my old inboxes. Some of the messages are funny. Some of them are sad. Some of them make little to no sense at all. I'll post a few.

11.16.008

I didn't mean what I said earlier. I really didn't. I try to think I hate you but I can't. I still love you, and care about you. I am losing control over the rational side my brain, everything is turning into mud.

David

I'm really sorry, dave. I didnt mean for things to turn out like this. I know I've said it many times before, but I honestly never meant to hurt you. I will call you soon. I promise.

-jeanette

real love

I love it...every second of it...

4 real talk

25 and alive

The truth

I can only make comparisons to basketball, because at the end of the day its pretty much the one thing I know well. I can name you every lottery* draft pick from 1984 til now. (Michael Jordan is going to the hall today. Clap your hands) At the end of the day, every guy is competing for the same girls. Girls get ranked by a point systems. A girl will get an overall average score based on everything from looks to knowledge of food to love for certain cheeses to....the ultimate x-factor, love for chicago sports, specifically the bulls.

What does any of this mean? Ok I'm getting there.

I'm never the guy any girl is really looking for. I have earned the role of hustle player...I am not nearly as good looking as some guys, or as fit, or as tall. But I make it all up with wit and charm, but in this game, we call that hustle. I am players player....a coaches player. What does that mean? Everyone loves me...the prettiest girls I know love me, they love me cause I play hard, and I pass the ball, and I am unselfish on the court...The boys love me for all the same reasons, but by no means am I an all-star, in fact, just look up Kurt Rambis*

I am part of a well oiled machine, and my niche and home is here. I can't function outside of it, I can't function with other players and when looked at by players from another team, I am the one they least fear.

So what does this mean? Ok, as much as I love Kurt Rambis, I am not going to sit Magic Johnsons down for more than 5 minutes if my team is down by 10. Sorry Kurt....same applies to girls...Its a novel and cute thing to get with Dave...but you aren't winning a championship with just me.

I turn 25 in 3 days. I hate all your boyfriends. They are grumpy and not funny. But I am sure you will love the inevitable break up. I'll still be here.

blogging

Blogging is cool. It's cool because you can write about your feelings, and talk about stuff, like how I feel.

seriously

Bullshit bullshit bullshit. I seriously don't understand women, and their fucking heads are so small I am sure they will never understand me. I will drink myself into a fucking coma tonight. I hate em. I hate em, I hate em I hate em...I can't stand one more second of this. Ef you sea kay. FUCK.

BIKE PROM BABY

All my friends are incredibly good looking. I love them all.